Yup, choosing your partner over your friends.
The article was saying how having a partner "changes" a person's choice; like how a often clubber chooses to stay home and chill with their partner, or how it felt so much more wonderful having someone there for them at the end of the day as compared to having one night flings; or how a partner is a 'forever' person, the one you will spend the rest of your life with. I do not completely disagree with that; yes, likewise for me and SL, we tell and update each other on what's going every single day and we don't tell friends even the littlest update.
I quote from the article,
"Friends are just the people who get you there. The ones who dry your tears, comfort you in moments of confusion, stand by you when you’re making mistakes and love you unconditionally. So maybe my friends deserved or deserve more but I truly believe friends are simply the people who guide you and remind you and are there until someone proves they are worthy of taking their place."
Yes, friends are people who guide us along the way when we need them for advices - our mirror reflection; people who can help us back on the right track when we are in denial; or when we need to rant after getting into fights with our bf/gf. I get it, absolutely. However, are you just going to make it seem like you need your friends only when you run into a situation? Sure you may feel that 'hey no matter what happens, he/she'll be my friend and I'll be here if they need me' but are they going to feel the same especially when they have made time/effort/initiative to spend time previously BEFORE you get into a relationship? It's not that we have to spend the same, equal time together; that would be ridiculous, but is it really too much to yknow, drop a text occasionally and catch up a little and perhaps set a date for a quick dinner? There are 7 days in a week and about 31 days in a month, I don't think it's heartless or selfish to make time for that few hours' catch up; c'mon, you still spend much more time with your bf/gf you can't deny that.
We can all understand that you want more time with your bf/gf but what about those days back when you were still single and we are in a relationship? I'm pretty sure I don't ditch my friends completely just because I'm in a relationship and rely on my friends knowing that I'll be forever here if they need; I make time for whatever that's going on in my life even though I had a boyfriend. I always appreciate friends who still occasionally text and ask me "how're you? meet up soon?" even though they are busy and attached; and yes I do text my close friends sometimes to ask about them, and initiate to meet. Fact is, I still get to see my best friend Rebz at least once/twice every month ever since we're occupied with our stuff and even though my bf is at Aussie and she's in a r/s; but of course we always text occasionally.
However, effort goes both ways. I stopped initiating conversations/meet-ups when I feel that I'm the only one wanting to maintain the friendship; when there's not even a single text, or occasional update, or anything, what I only see is their constant updates on their bf/gf online. So I figured I shouldn't bother too. I guess being in a LDR help me realize many things that I wasn't aware of previously since my bf isn't here physically; I figured I should stop wasting time on those unworthy. Even though my bf is with me throughout everything, I still do not feel that it's right to ditch friends completely; especially when I recall the years of how we started off as acquaintances, to friends, then to becoming good friends.
But I guess I should accept that not everyone feels the same.. haha don't get me wrong, I'm just a little disappointed that's all.
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